【拙译】Need You Now

云来

前言：

一时灵感，略模仿离骚体...

望老师、前辈们指点...

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Need You Now--Lady Antebellum　

望君相惜

（女）

Picture perfect memories，scattered all around the floor

往事绮丽兮，碎落满地

Reaching for the phone，'cause I can't fight it anymore

静候佳音兮，无以为继

And I wonder if I ever cross your mind，For me it happens all the time

我常思君兮，君可相忆

It's a quarter after one，I'm all alone and I need you now

丑时一刻兮，我念君矣

Said I wouldn't call，but I lost all control and I need you now　　

誓不往来兮，自持无力

And I don't know how I can do without，I just need you now

无君无我兮，望君相惜

（男）

Another shot of whiskey，can't stop looking at the door

酒入衷肠兮，难释离殇

Wishing you'd come sweeping，in the way you did before

思卿倩影兮，一如既往　　

And I wonder if I ever cross your mind，For me it happens all the time

卿可念吾兮，吾心徜徉

It's a quarter after one，I'm a little drunk and I need you now　　

丑时一刻兮，思卿若狂

Said I wouldn't call，but I lost all control and I need you now　　

曾言断绝兮，吾意今降

And I don't know how I can do without，I just need you now　　

卿在我在兮，长伴卿旁

Guess I'd rather hurt than feel nothing at all

（女）甘渡苦厄兮，难敌孤寂

（男）宁受痛楚兮，不堕虚妄

[此贴子已经被作者于2011-11-7 22:44:21编辑过]

古小即

太有创意了，这样的并列就很新鲜。行香子这段也迷楚辞体，倒可以切磋切磋。

一般人对丑时一刻没什么概念，或许也可直接表达夜深的感觉？

灵儿

很美啊，还很工整，就是译成中文后得配支新曲子了：）

行香子

笔译挫到不行的行香子同学表示佩服啊~~~

木兰晓芙

同意小即老师！整篇译文词藻又古雅又优美，唯“丑时一刻”似还可斟酌。

欧阳柳

对比看得津津有味